Every Now and Then...

something strikes a chord- you can relate to in almost every single aspect. A song, a movie, a TV show. Last night, Californication did just that for me.

Protagonist Hank Moody was having flashbacks of his life and his love for his love interest, Karen, and the show concluded with a letter he had written to her after they first met. The words in the letter almost directly apply to my feelings for someone in my life. The letter read as follows...

"Dear Karen,

If you're reading this, it actually means I worked up the courage to mail it, so good for me.

You don't know me very well, but if you get me started I have a tendancy to go on and on about how hard the writing is for me. But this, this is the hardest thing I've ever had to write. There's no easy way to say this, so I'll just say it.

I met someone. It was an accident. I wasn't looking for it. I wasn't on the make. It was a perfect storm. She said one thing, I said another. Next thing I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life in the middle of that conversation.

Now there's this feeling in my gut; She might be the one. She's completely nuts, in a way that makes me smile. Highly nuerotic. A great deal of maintainence required. She is you, Karen. That's the good news. The bad is that I don't know how to be with you right now and that scares the shit out of me. Because if I'm not with you right now, I have this feeling that we'll get lost out there. It's a big bad world full of twists and turns and people have a way of blinking and missing the moment, the moment that could have changed everything.

I don't know what's going on with us and I can't tell you why you should waste a leap of faith on the likes of me. But damn, you smell good, like home. And you make excellent coffee, and that's gotta count for something, right?

Call me

I'm faithfully yours,

Hank Moody"

Here's the video


As Eddie Vedder wailed the poignant lyrics of Pearl Jam's "Nothingman" in the background, David Duchovny, narrating as Hank Moody, a writer in LA, went on about his soul mate. His words are feelings to which anyone who has ever been truly in love can relate- feelings of confidence and self conciousness collide into one. You're so sure and unsure at once. But the bottom line is, despite the mess of questions, you know. You just know. You don't care what the circumstance is, what odds may be against you. You'll do whatever it takes. Moody knows. Love knows. I know. His letter struck a chord in me that I won't forget, the same way anyone else feels when they hear something that could have very well come from their own mouth. Moody's words may as well have been mine. The only words I would replace in his entire letter are the handful of "Karens" That name is reserved for someone else in my letter.